Updated: Apr 22
I am in an amazing place in my food journey. However, I one hundred percent have an eating problem. I eat to compensate for a lot of things, I eat to make myself feel better. I care a lot about food, I have gone through many different phases of eating (too much, too little, only this or that or way too much of this) and I have finally brought myself to a place where I feel like I can be honest with myself. It's hard to be in the dark about why you don't feel good. Sometimes you get to a point where you don't even know what normal feels like anymore. I often in the past felt quite alone on this journey because I thought it was only me who felt weird, my sister who has celiac has a reason for why she didn't feel good. This may sound bad but at least she knows. I would go to restaurants with friends or family and because I have been able to figure out certain random foods that my body doesn't agree with I'm always the picky one or the one who makes so many substitutions. Going out with some friends can be challenging, for example when they want to go for ice cream, again... you sit there while they all eat their delicious ice cream and say "why don't you just have one." It is frustrating because you want one, but if you say yes you will feel terrible for at least 2-3 days and that is what they don't understand. Or when you're at a group function and they forget to order a gluten free pizza for the few people who wanted it, so you quietly sit out and mind your own business. But someone comes up to you and asks why you're not having any, so you say "Oh don't worry I'm okay" and they treat it like you're doing your body harm, "you look amazing you don't need to lose weight, just have one slice." When in reality that's what you used to do and would feel so sick that you regret it for the rest of the night, have a gluten hangover and forget all your responsibilities for the next day.
This is a little rant. I want to keep my page positive so I want to end this on a good note. Stay true to yourself. Do not compromise your beliefs because someone else is telling you what they think is best for you. Do not put anything in your body that you do not want to. Do not let anyone make you feel guilty for cherishing and protecting your body.